“I am just too tired”

 “I don’t feel like it”

“He can’t come”

“Sex hurts”

Sexuality is a part of being human. However, talking about sex can be awkward and difficult for many.

Talking about sexual health problems can trigger feelings of disappointment and shame, leaving most to suffer in silence.

What is sex therapy in Singapore?

You might be wondering… is a sex therapist’s job to talk cock with you on a professional level?

Sort of. It’s not always focused on male and/or female genitalia, but rather, on the overarching psychology involved in sex.

Sex therapy is a form of “talk therapy” designed to address a person’s psychological or physical sexual problems. Sex therapy can be provided by doctors or qualified therapists who have done extra training in helping people with problems relating to sex. 

Maybe you’ve always had a little trouble, or maybe it only started recently. Maybe it’s physical or maybe it’s psychological. Maybe you’re not sure exactly what it is. No matter what’s going on, you can get professional and discreet help to work with you to overcome your situation.

You are not alone.

The truth is sexual health problems are more common than you might think. 

You might be surprised to hear that about 51.3% of respondents to a local survey done among 729 men (aged 30 and older) reported some degree of erectile dysfunction.  Read more about our article on How Common is Erectile Dysfunction in Singapore?

Also, it was uncovered in a 2013 Asia Pacific survey that 1 in 3 Asian men can’t last long enough in bed. Read more about premature ejaculation here.

According to the Mayo Clinic, sex therapy addresses various sexual issues such as:

·         Erectile functioning concerns

·         Ejaculating early (premature ejaculation)

·         Painful sex

·         Concerns about sexual desire or arousal

·         Concerns about sexual interests or sexual orientation

·         Impulsive or compulsive sexual behavior

·         Trouble reaching orgasm

·         Intimacy issues that could be related to a disability or chronic condition

·         Concerns regarding past traumatic sexual experiences

From concerns about sexual performance to just wanting to talk about basic relationship issues, sex therapy works. Psychological factors play a big role in the development of sexual health problems.

In men, the erection process is a seductive play between biological and psychological factors. It has been reported that about 40% of ED cases are considered psychogenic. Psychogenic ED is  also mostly found in young men under the age of 40 [1]. 

Depression, stress and relationship issues are some of the common causes of psychogenic ED. Hence, it is no surprise that treatment with medications needs to be supplemented by psychological assistance. Studies have shown that effective results are more commonly seen when medications are combined with psychological therapy [2].

In a 2017 study among breast cancer survivors diagnosed with sexual dysfunction, online sex therapy has also been found to be effective in restoring sexual functioning, body image and menopausal symptoms.

In short, sex therapy is the psychological medication to sexual wellness.

A fulfilling sex life is vital to your health for many reasons. Physical and emotional elements of a healthy sex life have far-reaching benefits, including better heart health, stronger immune function and stress reduction. Sex is also just a natural, fun part of life.

However, for some, sex can be a source of great anxiety and stress. Sexual dysfunction can lead to relationship problems, loss of confidence, and many other negative effects.

Sex therapy may be able to help address your concerns that may be physical or psychological, such as anxiety, stress and confidence issues. Similarly, if a lack of intimacy or difficulty communicating with a partner pulls you down, a sex therapist is a safe place to start.

Can anyone be a sex therapist in Singapore?

There is no certification required to call oneself a “sex therapist” or “sexual counsellor” or “sexuality educator”.

Yes, you could post advertisements online saying you offer sex therapy tomorrow and no governing body would come after you.

That said, just like you don’t take advice from unqualified people, you don’t take therapy sessions from unproven sources.

Sexual therapy is grounded in counselling, so look for people with some certification in psychology or counselling. 

Are these people members of the Singapore Psychological Society or Association of Psychotherapists and Counsellors Singapore? 

Does the service provider have a background and education in counselling?

That’s just some research that you have to do in order to find the best sex therapist for you.

First steps: see a doctor

Have you established the roots of your sexual problem?

If not, our doctors can help you establish the roots of your issues and create an action plan to treat your issues.

If your issues stem from psychological factors, then our doctors might advise you to take a pill to assist with that issue while taking a longer term approach that involves adopting healthier habits and receiving counselling.

How does a sexologist work?

When you visit a sexologist, you can either approach them as an individual or a couple.

In your initial communications with them, they will try to get a better understanding of what you need and how they can help you.

There are multiple approaches.

Is it a relationship issue that is causing sexual dysfunction? If so, then perhaps the best way to heal is to receive some counselling on how two loving partners can advance their relationship.

But perhaps it’s a personal issue, where the roots of the problem stem from an individual’s beliefs or experiences. Perhaps sex has always had a taboo for you and you want to overcome it. Or perhaps you have developed self-esteem issues that you’d like to overcome. These are some issues that a sex therapist can help you overcome.

In person? Telemedicine?

As a result of the telemedicine revolution in recent years, more and more sexologists in Singapore are offering assistance through Zoom, Skype or Google Meet.

However, if you prefer a more close-knit experience, you could also schedule an in person visit with a sex therapist.

Sex Therapists

1. Dame, online sex therapist in Singapore

SIRE specializes in telemedicine and virtual consultation. When it was first founded in 2020, it mainly focused on providing access to doctor consultation and discreet prescription medication delivery.

As SIRE’s community grew, more men (and couples) have stepped forward, looking for more holistic ways to improve their performance.

With Dame’s in-house therapist, you can be guaranteed that you will be working with sex therapist who are also registered psychologist or counsellors. This makes a difference, as the consultations are usually more productive and structured.

Not sure if online sex therapy or counselling is for you? There is a trial session of 20 minutes where you can speak to one of Dame’s therapist first.

You can find out more details about Dame’s sex therapy and mental wellness services.

2. Michael Thong

Michael has been in private practice since 2014 and is a chartered registered Clinical Psychologist with Rogerian Psychology Singapore. 

He is experienced and specializes in stress management, obsessive compulsion, depression, borderline personality issues, anxiety management, family and relationships concerns, LGBTQ, career counseling, addiction, intelligence and learning deficiency testing. 

Michael is a Chartered Psychologist with the British Psychological Society, and Registered Clinical Psychologist with Singapore Psychological Society. Michael is also a Singapore Registered Psychologist (SRP) Approved Supervisor.

Rogerian Psychology Singapore
Clinical Psychology & Counselling Clinic
63B Temple Street, Singapore 058608

3. Tammy Fontana MS NCC CTRT, USA Certified Sex Therapist, Hypnotherapist

Tammy Fontana is a licensed therapist with more than 15 years of practice in counselling in Singapore and abroad.

She offers therapy in person and online, targeted at couples and single people. One of her services is marriage and couple therapy that will help resolve conflict, increase intimacy and improve communication skills.

ALL IN THE FAMILY COUNSELLING CENTRE, PTE LTD
60 Paya Lebar Road, #11-06 Paya Lebar Square
Singapore 409051

4. Dee Stephen

Dee is a member of the Society of Australian Sexologists (SAS) and the Psychotherapy and Counselling Federation of Australia (PACFA) and adheres to the Code of Ethics and Practice. 

She holds a Bachelor of Behavioural Science (Psychology) degree from Monash University, Australia, a Masters in Social Science (Counselling) from the University of South Australia, and has completed a Masters in Science in Medicine in Sexual and Reproductive Health, specialising in psychosexual therapy from the University of Sydney. 

She is LGBTQIA+ affirmative.

Learn more about Dee Stephen here.

Start today.

At Dame, you can get access to licensed medical professionals who are experienced with dealing with sensitive issues like erectile dysfunction and premature ejaculation.

We have partnered with our second brand, Sire, to help you overcome your sexual mental barriers with professional sex therapy.

Everything can be done in your home and in privacy. Because after your consult, the treatments are even shipped discreetly to your home.

References:

1.       Pakpahan C, Agustinus A, Darmadi D. Comprehensive intersystemic assessment approach to relieve psychogenic erectile dysfunction: a review. Open Access Maced J Med Sci. 2021;9(F):189-196. doi:10.3889/oamjms.2021.6116

2.       Melnik T, Soares BG, Nasselo AG. Psychosocial interventions for erectile dysfunction. Cochrane Database Syst Rev 2007; :CD004825.

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